Monday, March 7, 2011

Interesting Day

Today has been an interesting day.  I'm not sure I can or should elaborate much more than that for now.

I found myself at the doctor's office today to discuss some recent lab results.  She sent me to an imaging lab to have a sonogram - Step 1 of the diagnostic process.  A couple of things made the afternoon "interesting".  One is that the tech asked me at the beginning if I had ever had any surgery on my abdomen and I told her "no" - which was the truth.  I'm sure she was a little confused not seeing things that she expected to see.  Anyways, she said that they'll analyze it and get back to my doctor tomorrow.  Or the next day at the latest.

The second thing that made it "interesting" is that the doctor is already thinking ahead to the next step and doesn't know a specialist who might be "accepting".   A friend on Facebook recently asked a question about whether or not people have been discriminated against because they were trans.  It happens all the time.  The fact that you can't go see someone or that you need to go and see someone specifically because of who is or isn't "accepting" is in itself a form of discrimination.  Just because you surround yourself by a teeny oasis of acceptance so your experiences are mainly positive ones can be to live in a world based on a false sense of security.  Just wait until you're forced outside that comfort zone.

I also find myself disappointed in a number of things and people today.  Some are in response to other events going on in my life at the moment.  And you learn a lot about people at critical times, how they act, what they say, the tone of their voice - the same as you learn a lot about yourself at those same times.  It can be argued that perceptions of both can be clouded by the moment.

Disappointment is an odd emotion.  It's based totally on expectation, and perhaps it's my own fault for having expectations in the first place.  But I've come to appreciate the fact that when I invest myself in someone or something I like to think it's an even-steven equation.  Sometimes, it proves to be so.  Sometimes not.

You know who doesn't disappoint?  My pups.  And my mom.....

And "Finding Nemo".  That never disappoints....

And "The Blind Side".  I'm watching it as I type this.  That never disappoints either.  There's a scene where these parents are making fun of Michael during a game and he ends up blocking this kid over a fence.  Eventually Sandra Bullock turns to these parents and says, "Hey, Deliverance...."  I dunno - I just find it funny.  

One of these is me.  The other is my sister.
I think I mentioned that my mom gave me a big box of old photos last time I was there.  I've slowly been scanning some of them.  It's fun to see some of these.  They're almost 50 years old now.  So long ago, but still part of my life.  Still part of me.

We set a record here yesterday.  Actually, we smashed one.  Apparently, the record for 24 hr. rainfall around here was 1.8 inches of rain.  Yesterday we had almost 2 1/2 inches.  Then, it turned to snow.  By the time we woke up there was 3 inches of it on the ground.  Funny thing is, sometimes we get that much rain in a couple of hours during a monsoon in Phoenix.


Melissa said...

Who ever would have thunk, that cute little boy, would one day grow up to be a beautiful elegant woman? I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you on the test results.

Melissa XX

Anonymous said...

Donna, You mentioned "the doctor is already thinking ahead to the next step and doesn't know a specialist.." I am dealing with this exact predicament with the VA - I am a 20 years served retired Veteran. I have not had an endocrinology visit in more than 3 years, every one of the six endo's in the Corpus Christi, TX area has refused to treat me, citing "we don't do that kind of work.." It's discrimination, plain & simple, and presents a totally unfair predicament for my health. But I will be the only one to lose any sleep. Kim