Saturday, June 22, 2013

The Longest Day + 1

Yesterday was the "official" first day of summer.   It has felt like summer for a few weeks, so whether or not it was "officially" here, nothing has really changed.  Another milestone of the day was that had more hours of daylight than any other day.  From here on out....the days get shorter.  Can winter really be far behind?  I hope it can....

The high temperatures here yesterday were in the mid-90's.  It's supposed to be like that all thru next week.  No complaints here.  You won't ever hear me complain about the heat, dry or otherwise.  It's the cold that brings out the whiner in me.

I met a friend out for dinner this week at a local burger place that I've heard about.  Honest to God - I'm still full.  There was just so much burger.  Oy.  Again - no complaints here.  It was a very pleasant evening.

I woke up this morning, and the remnants of a brief conversation that I had yesterday were reverberating in my head for some reason.  It was a discussion about the early days of my transition - the days that were the backdrop for my book (that's what started our chat in the first place).

The sorrow, the confusion, the terror of the time has faded.  But I couldn't help but feel a sense of deja-vu.  At the time, circumstances were such that I had to leave home and I moved into an apartment.  I really didn't have much there...just the basics.  A bed, a sofa, a tv, a dresser.

Fast forward 14 years.  I woke up this morning in my little bedroom - the one I shared the photo of a few days ago.  I'm in an apartment - separated from what I consider to be home by circumstance.  Thankfully, the much of the emotion of those days gone by is gone.  But I'd be lying if I said that they hadn't been replaced by other, just as forceful, emotions.

I was watching MoneyBall they other day - the Brad Pitt movie about the Oakland A's - and his daughter in the movie plays a song for him that she wrote.  Her parents are divorced, she's a young teen, and the song really seemed to catch all of the complicated elements involved in those kinds of things.

The song really resonates for me, as well, and could very well sum up many of my own feelings right now.  I've played it a half dozen times....

Anyway - it's complicated.

This is the first "down" weekend I've had in a long, long time.  I'm not traveling.  I'm not moving a bunch of furniture into or out of someplace.  I don't have a long "to-do" list.  I had originally planned to be in Charleston but those plans got changed, so I've got a couple of days to relax.  I don't know that it's a bad thing, but I'm going to need to just gear down and enjoy it.  I need to clean my make-up brushes. Maybe I'll go to the pool for a little while.  I need to get to the gym and work off that burger.  I'd like to see "World War Z" in IMAX 3D.  I want to do some exploring.  I still need to do unpacking and nesting.

 All things considered, I don't expect I'll be bored.

I'd love to go to a Barre class.  But, believe it or not, they don't have a place that does barre here. The closest Barre studio to here seems to be just outside of Kansas City... a 3ish hour drive.  Lord knows it's not beyond me to get in my car to head there to do something like that, and I suspect I'll do that at some point in the future, but not this weekend.  I'd rather avoid the 6 hours in the car and the expense of the gas at the moment.

In an earlier post I mentioned the tree just off my patio that I needed to prune to get my satellite tv installed.  Over the past week I have learned that the tree is home to several birds.  Sometimes they land on the ground near the base of the tree.  Sometimes they just sit on a branch and chirp - loud and proud.    I'm thinking of putting a bird feeder in it for them.

As I type this that's the sitting on my couch, with my back patio door open, the relatively cool morning air flowing into the apartment, and the sound of a bird chirping.  It's actually pretty peaceful.  Not a bad way to start the day....

1 comment:

Sophie Lynne said...

You deserve a weekend of peace... once in a while. ;)

Reflective moments can be a double edged sword- they can bring us peace or the plague of thoughts that we'd been avoiding. Focus on the peace and recharge.

Enjoy your day!