Christmas 2012

It's over.  Christmas is done.  Phew.  Like as I know it won't begin again until after New Year's, but at least the hurdle of Christmas is past.

Honestly, Christmas was actually very pleasant.  Breakfast with a friend.  A visit to the ocean.  A wonderful dinner with part of my Charleston "family"....the second year in a row.  

The morning was especially notable.  Charleston was like a ghost town.  Nobody was out except the dog-walkers.  No traffic.  No runners.  No tourists.  No traffic.  There were no cars in the 24-hr. supermarket parking lot.  It was eerie.  Actually, it was wonderful....

But it's all back to normal today.  Tours are going down the street.  Shoppers are out.  The strong storms that made their way across the south passed thru with some rain and thunder but now it's just cooler and windy and sunny.  I feel like I should be at work....it feels odd to not be.

Something insignificant but telling happened a couple of days ago.  I had a big box with a TV in it that I brought over to the apartment from my storage unit.  It's big and bulky, and sort of heavy, but I'm used to doing things by myself and I've carried it in and out of here several times...up and down the stairs.  Anyway, I was getting ready to pick it up on the sidewalk in front of where I live and a man walked by and asked me if I needed help.

Now, I knew I could do this by myself.  But really, it's easier if there are two people.  And, for some reason, I said no....that I've done it before and I'd be fine.  He asked me if I was sure and I picked it up so he went on his way.

I should have said "yes".  In fact, there are times in the past when there have been things that I've needed to carry into here that are too big for just me where I've stopped the first person walking past and they've always helped.   But in the split second where this guy asked if he could help or not in my mind I knew I didn't need it so I didn't accept it.

As I say...not a significant thing.  But it retrospect I find it telling.  I find it hard to ask for or accept help even though I know I need it sometimes.  It's hard for me.

Today has been a quiet day.  There have been a couple of times when I've thought about going to the gym but the reality is that another of my "problems" is that I don't know when to just slow down.  So - I spent part of the day visiting with my neighbors across the hall (wonderful people), park of it putzing around here at home, and part of it hooking up an Apple TV.  I'm going to spend a quiet afternoon, and learn to do that more often....if it kills me.

The Holidays are a time of introspection and reflection.  It's a time to look at your life....at what you've done as well as road left to cover.  I think it's also a time to look at your life and consider things about yourself that you'd like to (or need to) change.  That process is ongoing.

I stopped to see my friends at the local MAC store this morning.  They had several new collections come out today and, as I've said, everyone who works there has become a friend.  There are genuine smiles and hugs when I stop by...on both sides.

One of the collections is called "Strength".  The particular reason I mention it here is the promo photo for it:

That's one of the things I love about the company.  Recognizing that strength and femininity are not necessarily mutually exclusive.  Unsurprisingly, the photo has generated a number of comments - both positive and negative - if you look for them.

Anyway - I bought my usual small stash.  And on Friday I've got an appointment to actually learn how to use it.  :)  That's another thing I love about them.

I don't know that I've come up with a theme for Christmas 2012.  It was just a day.  I spent part of  it with people who have become pseudo-family on a number of levels.  I spent part of it comfortably alone.  There was no pressure.  There was no agenda.