It's Christmas eve. 6:30am
I was out and about for a while yesterday and don't know if people were more filled with joy, anger, anxiety, or relief that it's almost over. I think the so-called "Holiday Season" brings out both the best and worst in people. It's days like this I'm happy to be away from it all.
It can be quite the time to endure. I recently read on article on Huffington that I'm sure many of us can relate to (read it here). One friend sent Christmas gifts to rejecting family and they were returned, unopened. I could go on and on with those kinds of stories but what's the point?
I'm fortunate because my family is wonderful and I could certainly go and spend the Holidays with them. But truth be told I'm enjoying my "me" time right now.
As the year winds down there automatically some level of analysis. Over this past year several of the relationships in my life have shifted significantly, while others that weren't in the picture have become more important. Physically, I'm still in good shape but I am noticing that it's not the same as it was. Mentally, I'm feeling good. And generally, the thing I'm most thankful for (after my health) is having a generally good sense of balance right now.
Christmas eve 9pm
So....it's not an evening unlike other evenings. I'm watching a movie that I've been wanting to see. It's an animated movie that came out a couple of years ago that I didn't get to see in the theaters: "How To Train Your Dragon". I'm really enjoying it. It's cute. Plus - there's lots of it I can identify with. I only hope it doesn't make me cry.
For years, our family quote-unquote Christmas Movie was the old "A Christmas Carol" with Alastair Sim. But I haven't even seen it available on any of my channel for years. I remember all of us watching it together - my brother and sister and dad. There's all kinds of newer versions....but it's not the same. Like many of my other Holiday memories they're now just that - memories. That's not a bad thing...in fact I cling to them. I don't have to keep reliving them year after year. I think the key is to make new ones.
It was a good day. I was out early and said "Merry Christmas" to a few friends around town. I did a couple of last minute shopping things. I took a nap. I had dinner with a certain friend, and her family. Now I'm watching my movie, and feeling good. I've had a couple of invitations to do things this evening but, to be honest, this kind of simple thing is exactly what I need right now. I'll be in bed early.
My only Christmas decoration is my trusty stocking that my sister made for me. It doesn't have anything in it, but at least it's got my name on it. And the one of the two presents I bought for myself is under it by the fireplace. A new camera. I'll open it tomorrow, so I'll have something to play with.
As you can see - I've gone to the dark side. This is my first Nikon. I had to get myself one thing....and this is that thing. Photography makes me happy. It always has. And if I have my way it will be a profession more than a hobby at some point.
Last year I got myself a bike. The year before....well, I can't remember.
Anyway - time for an egg nog concoction I've come up with....egg nog with a "touch" of Baily's Irish Cream, Kahlua, vodka. Then....sleep.
Tomorrow - a bit of breakfast, a bike ride or a run, some time here at the apartment, some time playing with my new "toy". I've got dinner planned with some friends at their beautiful house. It's supposed to rain in the afternoon...but the high will be 65. We'll see how it unfolds. That's half the fun.
I've talked with a couple of friends today who are struggling with family issues. As many of us know....the Holidays seem to bring things to a head sometimes, for better or for worse.
But - to whoever out there reads what I write - Happy Holiday, Merry Christmas, and I hope that wherever you are and whatever you believe you're at Peace. As far as I'm concerned - that's the goal for all of this.