Monday, October 1, 2012

The Blip

This weekend was a reminder of what it's like to relax.  Re-charge.  Deep breaths.  Smell the roses.  Foot on the brake.  Call it whatever you want. This was a weekend to do it.

It's not that I've forgotten how to do it over recent weeks.  The only time I really get to myself at the moment is weekends so I try to make the most of them. I've actively fit as much "me" time into the mix as I can lately which has helped offset the other stuff.  This past weekend was totally chill, and I'm totally happy 'bout that.

I'll be the first to acknowledge that much of the imbalance in my life at the moment is self-inflicted.  That is, if you want something that's going to cause a "blip" in your life you need to be prepared to actually deal with the blip.  Frankly, I'm more comfortable with self-inflicted drama than external-inflicted drama because at least then you've got some say in the matter.

In this case specifically, if I didn't drive back to Charleston every weekend and accepted that I could use the time to get comfortable elsewhere life would be a lot simpler right now.  But I'm not willing to let go, and I can be fairly stubborn.

One of the notable features in Charleston are the graveyards.  There are some fairly spectacular ones, with notable names ranging from the Declaration of Independence to the Civil War to more current times.

In a city with so much to offer, graveyards here are a big deal.  The Magnolia Cemetery is listed on TripAdvisor as the #9 attraction in Charleston.  And there are even tours of Graveyards at night - lots of ghosts and spirits there.

The reason I mention any of this is that some of the stonework is extraordinary.  I can't help but wonder what the people who are on the gravestones were like.  And the landscape for many of these graveyards is remarkable, too.

So, I was walking downtown and took a photo (w my iPhone) of some of the headstones and an orange butterfly comes into the frame.  I like to think it's a spirit.....

Anyway, the thing that struck me is that it reminds me of the image on my ankle...

Symbolism is a big thing for me......

There's an article on the CNN website today worth mentioning.  The governor of CA signed a law that passed both houses in the state banning gay "conversion therapy" (story here).  Gov. Brown signed legislation that outlaws so-called "therapy" aimed at turning gay kids straight, saying such efforts "will now be relegated to the dustbin of quackery."

Major kudos on that one.

But I also noted that the group that actually promotes this stuff - NARTH (see website here) -  issued a statement saying (per CNN):

... the law will seriously jeopardize the livelihoods of "licensed therapists in California who would otherwise be willing to assist minor clients in modifying their unwanted same-sex attractions and behaviors." It also will "supplant the rights of parents," the group says.

Ummm.  If these "licensed therapists" are dependent upon their conversion therapies for their livelihood it's probably best that they find a new actually useful skill anyway. 

Anyway....this stuff makes me crazy.

Speaking of crazy....I've made active efforts over the weekend to pare down my Facebook "flock" of friends.  I have no idea how the total number got to 5,500+ but at some point it stopped my ability to add anyone while I was over the FB limit of 5,000.

I normally wouldn't care all that much, but the fact of the matter is that I've got a number of friends and relative who I WANT to stay in touch with who I can't add because I'm over the limit.  It won't even allow people to send a friend request.  So...I got up early on Sunday and spent some time looking at things.

First off....there are many people who have Friended me who are just plain gone.  Those are easy to delete, but it involves looking at each one.  Anyone specifically tied to a previous "thing" in my life got serious consideration for pruning, too.  HRC and other groups I've been involved with....if it's not pertinent anymore we probably don't need to stay in touch on FB.

Any Friend who is purely political...sorry.   Anybody with photos of nudity, or anything I'd consider "explicit"....sorry.  FB isn't the place for that.  And near the end I was just tired so I wasn't being nearly as careful.   Anyways....I deleted over 500 people so if anyone reading this isn't a Friend anymore who wants to be I apologize in advance. 

As of this very second, FB thinks I've got 4,999 Friends.  I'll get back to work at it tonight at the hotel, but I'm feeling like something that needed doing got done.  Pretty sad, but true....


Caroline said...

I tried fb for a while since people were pestering me to sign up. Sadly many who once blogged have taken the easy way out and moved to the dark side and now only manage the odd line there.

Research has shown that most people can only continue meaningful contact with about 150 maximum so I was always careful to get friend requesters to explain how they found me and why they wanted to be friends, that saw most off straight away and I was relieved because I had assumed that "friends" would want to be friendly!

Many who passed my test failed to interact so would get a goodbye note then be deleted. Sadly the fb setup does not always let you see your "friends" posts so you have to seek them out, hardly possible with a large number of "friends", it became too frustrating...

Constant changes like their timeline and their changing of privacy settings without warning or making them an opt in drove me to give notice of leaving. Hardly anyone responded and they were all bloggers who were in sympathy with my position!

You were always being suggested by fb as someone I should be "friends" with but it is your blog and your photos which I follow so what more could we get from fb? Many there seemed to be finding it too arduous and were pushing to start twittering!

fb is just a tool but it was not one which suited me. I am so glad that I deleted my account and walked away...

Sophie Lynne said...

I've toured the graveyards and done a ghost tour there. One churchyard in paticular interested me. For one, there is another churchyard across the busy street. That is becuase the street bisected one churchyard and made it 2. (Did they move the bodies? Do i see a Poltergeist movie?)

Second, there's a sign posted inside the fence. Seems that there is a well publicised haunting there. The sign says "The Only Ghost Here is the Holy Spirit."


Oh, andYou? Stubborn? Perish the thought! ;)

michel doc said...

I love it. I hope that more and more Blogger will use this feature in the future, because it just makes the internet better I think!

Glas till iphone 4

Katherine Hohmann said...

I sit in a Scottsdale hotel just 36 hours away from rebirth. I find my facebook community a pleasant "distraction". I know a lot of the community as coworkers, family and friends of the past. Then there are those I never met, but have come to know for some existential reason. Call it spiritual maybe. I am glad to "know" you through fb, your blogs, your interviews, your book. You have been a wonderful inspiration in my journey. Thanks!