Outlook

It's a pretty Sunday morning.  I'm having breakfast at a hotel in Columbia SC.  As of Sept 1 I've gone my own version of a high protein/low carb diet for a while.  The first few days of these things are usually "interesting" but I've done them before so it's nothing I can't handle.  Your body gets used to lots of sugar so even though you may be eating other things, not having the typical high dose of carbs causes a "withdrawal".  Yuck.  But necessary.

As I've said in the past, I don't weigh myself.  I gauge my size by my clothes, and in particular by some slacks I own.  So, I'll know when I'm done when I can fit back into these pants.  I've started running again, too, which I've been pretty slack at doing over the summer.  It's just time to get back to it after a much needed "rest" following the intensity of the wrestling stuff.  That's pretty much the cycle of my life - intense/rest/intense/rest....

I was in Charleston for most of the day yesterday which was very pleasant.  I've been working in Raleigh for two weeks now and both weekends have included day-trips back home.  So far so good in that regard...it provides balance.  I still haven't found a place to settle - partly because a few things that seemed like possibilities have proven to include to much drama.  And partly because I'm still to unsettled to get settled.  That probably sounds like a paradox, but it's true.

I've decided to change hotels, though.  That starts tomorrow, so my Labor Day will be spent moving again.  From one hotel to another.  That may not sound like much work but I've actually got quite a bit of stuff collected from not knowing that I'd be able to get back to Charleston so frequently.  I suspect it will take the better part of the afternoon, assuming that it's not pouring.  I need to put the stuff in the back of the truck so if it's raining that'll slow things down.

I spent part of the day yesterday at the gun range trying various handguns. I'm focused .45's and have been doing research for a while now.  But shooting is like driving - it's one thing to read reviews or see videos online bu nothing can replace actually getting one in your hand so you can feel it.  It's amazing how different one gun is from another in terms of how it feels, how it aims, the kick after the shot...there are lots of dynamics involved.

One of the guys there was very, very helpful in looking over my shoulder, making some suggestions on stance and things to do/not do.  It really helped, and I both enjoyed and appreciated his help.  He got me an extra target and put it out - wanted to see what I could do with it.  Well, I did myself proud. (I'll post a picture of it on my SnapLog).  The person I usually deal with there is a woman a little younger than I am but she's a hoot.  Anyway...I enjoy going there.

I realize that guns are a touchy subject.  I appreciate that, and they're not for everyone.  I'm relatively new to them myself.  But one of the ingredients I'm looking for in my first firearm purchase is one that's actually fun to shoot.  I enjoy going to the range.  That's more important to me than getting something small I can put in my purse, or getting something that I'm going to lock in a drawer in my house and hope to never use.  I've learned that when I'm interested in something I wade pretty deep and I can already tell this is going to be one of those things.

Anyway - For this first gun I've pretty much settled on the specific model I'll be buying, and where I'll be buying it from.  Now it's a matter of saving the $$$ given all the other expenses in my life at the moment.  In one of those unique life balance things, another of my errands yesterday was to visit my people at the MAC counter.  I recently ordered some makeup and had to go pick it up.  I know most of the girls there by name and look forward to seeing them, too.  They're a cool, fun, hip kinda crowd.

That's what I'm talking about when I say that Charleston has come to be "home".  I know people there. They make doing things fun.  And as I've articulated here recently wherever I go for work - I'm going to keep a foothold in the Low Country.  That's my grounding.  That's my center right now.  I'll visit it every weekend if I have to, but for now the saying that absence makes the heart grow fonder is true in that respect.

I've said in the past that I consider FB to be a blessing and a curse.  But when it is a blessing - that's what keeps me there.  People I haven't kept in touch with over the years or surprising things that turn up.  Otherwise, I would have disconnected from it a long time ago.  When I stop seeing that value - I'll unplug.

In the meantime I started deleting 'Friends' from FB since I'm way over the limit and people I actually want to keep in touch with can't connect with me.  If all you post is political stuff - we really don't need to be friends.  We probably already have similar views anyways, so don't get your feelings hurt if it happens.  If all we have in common is "trans" stuff - and we don't connect regularly - that's probably not enough either.  Anyway, I'm trying to delete upwards of 25 people a day so I can get to a point of being able to add people I actually know.

I've got some errands to do here in Columbia today so I'm going to head out to start.  I'm relatively upbeat at the moment for some reason - not sure why considering all that's happening in the background that I'm not talking about.  But the important part of life is outlook - that helps to overcome the gloomiest of days.

Onwards.